World Cup Final Thoughts

It has been about a month since the World Cup of Hockey, give or take s few days and it’s taken me this long to fully digest the results and parse my feelings on the whole tournament.  Now that it’s over the familiar refrain of “Canada always wins” is drowning everything else out but there were some glorious minutes where that story was pushed to the back by a much more interesting one. That’s what I want to look back on.

Let’s celebrate Team Europe because my heart is always with the biggest underdog, although if you want to argue results  Finland had the worst record of the teams I was pulling for but they were hardly considered an underdog going into the tournament.

For a team whose presence seemed at first simply the barest attempt at showing some type of NHL inclusiveness, Europe acquitted themselves brilliantly. They went further than anyone thought they could and challenged the current dominant hockey country for the championship.

While the NHL wants to bill this as an “international competition” it was clear from the start that the real goal was to showcase their talent. That much was clear when they built North American under 23 team just to show off to the world that “we have so much talent on this continent that we need three teams to represent two countries.”

The groups were carefully constructed to facilitate a US vs Canada or Russia vs Canada showdown in the final but alas the US didn’t hold up its end of the bargain. To be fair Russia at least squeaked out two wins, one against North American and one against Finland but fell to Canada rather unspectacularly in the semifinals.

The US went home without a win, a completely predictable result given that they couldn’t bring in any under 23 talent and were saddled with the most toxic coach active in the league today.

I wouldn’t have expected to say this but I felt bad for them as the press was perfectly happy to glory in their misery. In typical cowardly fashion the coaches and organizers of team USA, around whose neck those three losses should rightly hang, sent five demoralized players out to face the media shit storm following their last disastrous game. On top of the loss they had to answer questions about a tactless vitriolic tweet that Phil Kessel added to the bloody feeding frenzy insinuating that his presence would somehow have lifted them to a win. Suffice to say a group of players who didn’t deserve it got hung out to dry while also being kicked in the gut by a supposed ally.

Let’s not linger on that any longer. Instead let’s focus on the real story a team that deserved more respect than it got from start to finish.

( I should also mention that my assessment before the tournament that Slovakia should have its own team would have been a disaster for Team Europe. At very least the organizers understood that. When projected starting goal tender, Denmark’s Frederik Andersen went down with an injury before the pre-tournament it was up to Jaroslav Halak to step up and step up he did! Without him this team would have fizzled the way everyone expected.)

At the start of every game my heart bled as Team Europe stood listening to the national anthem of whatever country they were playing against. They of course had no anthem. No one could put together a medley or something? Furthermore the classless fans in Toronto, consistently booed the players during introductions. Despite all that, men from eight countries with nothing to play for but pride and each other came together to make a cohesive shut down team. After faltering early they used their pre-tournament matches to build a team spirit and a focus. They wanted to prove that they belonged at this level and they certainly did that.

To begin with, while teams USA, North America and Canada were comfortably preparing at home, most members of team Europe had to play in Olympic qualifiers before they could even fly to Quebec to begin forming their team. Their first practice consisted of less than a dozen jet lagged players. 58a7ec69b86d2145bb01571e45ada8c2

In their first pre-tournament game against North America they were outplayed badly. In their second game against North America they bounced back and put up four goals but still lost to a much younger, speedier team.

This is not to say that the make of up team Europe was shoddy in any way. Team captain Anze Kopitar may be the only NHL player from Slovenia but he’s taken the Stanley cup home for a visit twice, led his team in scoring and been a finalist for the Selke trophy twice, and the list goes on. No seriously it goes on. I suggest you take a look.

Alternate captain Zdeno Chara, a personal favorite I have to admit, has led his team to a Stanley cup, won the Norris Trophy and been to the all star game so often it’s a rare year when he isn’t there. He’s also played an important part in many World Championship’s for Slovakia not to mention a couple Olympic appearances.

Names like Gaborik, Hossa, Tatar  and Zuccarello are all household names. Hossa, also from Slovakia has a couple Stanely cup rings with the Blackhawks. Roman Josi is an up and coming star on defense. I won’t run through the whole roster but you can find it here.

However, just focusing on the results of the two games I had seen, things looked pretty bleak at this point and I expected nothing but heartbreak. After all most of the national teams included swaths of players who had been to the Olympics together or at very least played an international tournament together. I don’t think any two members of Team Europe even play on the same NHL team. These guys literally did not know each other.

But if I was doubtful it was because I was completely ignorant of Ralph Krueger’s coaching legacy. He is a former player.  In his first coaching gig in Austria he led his team to five


Krueger and Jaroslav Halak

straight titles and went on to coach the Swiss national team. Under his guidance in the 2006 Olympics, Switzerland placed ahead of Canada after shutting them out. Think about that for a second. Not only did Canada finish outside the podium they were below Switzerland and without being rude I think I can say that is a sentence you don’t see very often.


Krueger was a consultant for the Canadian team in preparation for the Sochi Olympics. He’s also written a best seller on coaching so if you want to build a team that can out perform expectations he is the place you want to start. By the time team Europe played their third pre-tournament game against Sweden it was clear that Krueger had worked his magic.  They were out shot but made up for it in blocks and certainly made their shots count, scoring six goals on Henrik Lundqvist, considered one of the best in the business.

Despite everyone’s continual insistence that this team couldn’t really be a team I felt that was their biggest strength. They were a cohesive unit on the ice with good communication and patience. They moved the puck well, defended seamlessly and had a surprising amount of goal support. They also kept out of the penalty box which is pretty key to winning hockey games. In the round robin portion they had one OT scare from the Czech Republic but took home the win.

They shut down team USA completely despite being out shot.


Tomas Tatar shoots on a very out of position Jonathan Quick

Their only loss was to Canada who was expected to cut through everyone like butter and basically did.

Team Europe found itself matched against Sweden in its semi-final match and just saying Europe was in the semi final was blowing minds at that point. No one really expected them to come out on top anymore than anyone really expected Canada to fall to a Russian team who had scraped into the semi’s by the skin of their teeth. Europe again stuck it to Lundqvist in over time and propelled themselves into the final.

The impossible match up was set, a team no one expected to ever need a national anthem faced off against the dominant hockey team in the world. Still fans expected the next two games, for no one would have predicted needing a third, to be utter blood baths. They weren’t. Europe may have gone down in two games but not without making team Canada nearly shit itself that it might actually have its perfect tournament record tarnished.

In the final game Europe held a one goal lead until the final three minutes, which was basically when Mike Babcock started to sweat at the idea of losing and pulled out the white board on a time out.

Maybe my expectations for this team should have been higher but even I underestimated them. All I can say is it was a pleasure to watch them frustrate the hell out of the teams they played and I have to hold on to that because the game two loss was a bitter pill to swallow. They were the better team that night. Canada had to pull a rabbit out of a hat to beat them and that is really something.

Despite being booed in every introduction in Toronto, Chara still maintained his class act positive attitude citing it as the most competitive tournament he has played because guys were fresh at the start of the season rather than showing up to the World Championships after missing or losing in the play offs.

If there is a next time for the World Cup of Hockey I hope Krueger and Team Europe get a chance to do it again even if it means letting the North Americans double dip. In my mind it was worth it.


This is the moment! With an overtime win over Sweden Europe was headed to the final and at this particular moment anything was possible.

This is a follow up to this post. Read the Pre-pre-tournament rant here.

feminism, Uncategorized

Destroying the Anti-porn Argument

The word feminist is so impossibly loaded for me because it comes with a list of restrictions I cannot possibly meet.

Here’s a few of the things I’ve run into:A good feminist has a career instead of a family or a good feminist stays home with her children or a good feminist nurses in public or a good feminist doesn’t shave or wear make up or have too much sex. She certainly doesn’t watch porn or read romance novels because they emphasize “strong” men and “weak” women and promote “gender norms”. Woman who write such things must then be the ultimate betrayers of our gender.

Oh and lest I forget, she always opens her own doors, doesn’t ask for help, she has to study instead of party, “slay the dragon” instead of aspiring to be “a pretty princess” because she couldn’t possibly do/be both.

I call Bullshit!

There is no good feminist or bad feminist. There’s only feminists and a feminist does whatever the FUCK she wants. Because choice is freedom and it’s not up to me or you to decide how a person should express their freedom.

As a writer of both “pornography” and romantic themes am I harming the movement? It’s a question that haunts me constantly and holds me back from sharing what I’ve crafted. How much sex is too much for the page? When do I cross the boundaries of what is acceptable to remain a “good” feminist? It stalls out my creative process and leaves me stuck holding imaginary conversations where I defend my lifestyle and my work and my motivations.

I shave my legs. Does that mean I don’t really believe in equality? How does my choice to shave or not impact the movement as a whole? Short answer: it doesn’t. The fact that I am making my own choice in the matter after weighing how I feel about the process and the result is extremely important. Literally I do it when I feel like it. My partner doesn’t demand it and I give zero fucks whether my legs meet any standard set by some unscrupulous retailer pedaling wares. I buy men’s razors because they’re cheaper and better and that is that and I really don’t need to be defending it here either but such is life.

I have found over time and experimentation that I care about my appearance even though I’ve been on a beauty media fast for nearly a decade. Putting time into my hair and sometimes makeup makes me feel like I care about myself. It’s the time invested and not so much the result that matters to me. For me that is respecting myself. For someone else the conclusion could be different and that’s also extremely important. Putting time into your appearance does not determine your self worth but I have learned that I personally need to put in that effort to demonstrate to myself by looking at myself in the mirror and embellishing my strong points that I am worthy of looking good.

Allow me some shameless soapboxing here.

This will of course vary from woman to woman because regardless of gender no two people are alike. This variance, just like all diversity of thought, intent etc is what enriches our sex as a whole. In living out our truths, whatever they may be and accepting everyone else’s right to do so, we validate shall I say, even elevate each other.

I know this. I believe this so why is it so different when it comes to pornography?

I would dare to theorize that our attitude toward porn is driven by feelings of jealousy, inadaquacy and therefore sex shaming of other women.

This is why I feel it is waspish and outdated.

The assumption I think, is that all sex work must be exploitation because it boggles the minds of many that such an activity would be entered into willingly. Well that’s just rude. Is there exploitation? Do some women turn to prostitution, porn and stripping for lack of other options? Certainly but in my book that gives us even less right to judge them. If we were willing to listen to sex workers and there are many that are vocal on the subject, their reasons for entering the profession are varied.

Furthermore whether mainstream “good” feminists want to admit it our not exhibitionists exist. That is to say for some people sexual performance comes naturally and may even be a dream come true. We all find fulfillment in different ways and some people are natural born performers in one way or another. Some women genuinely love it. Obviously not everyone does but I’m always shocked when people in my profession love being bank tellers. I find that to be unfathomable madness but I can’t deny it’s true and more power to them.

Why is it different if a woman chooses to put on heels and get down on her knees and suck cock in front of a camera. By saying that the only way for her to get there is force is to undermine her power to choose. It also reinforces the archaic notion that some very basic vanilla sex acts are taboo. I must meet this the way I do all things I find utterly preposterous, with a hearty “Are you fucking kidding me?” followed quickly by a “what fucking year is this anyway?”

Another factor lurking behind all this is the assumption that “good girls” don’t really enjoy sex or watching sex or have any sort of lust at all. Clearly we haven’t come that far from the attitude that a woman should “lie back and think of England.” I suppose a hundred or so years is a blink of an eye in terms of evolution but for those of us ahead of the curve it feels like an age.

At the root of it the attitudes are based on the flawed idea that there is a right way and a wrong way to be a woman and whether you’re a professed feminist or a total misogynist limiting woman’s behavior based on a standard of appropriateness has the same ugly result, shame for the woman in one category and smugness for the woman in the other. I just want to mention that even the woman who fit the “good” category are harmed because they can see how easy it is to fall from grace and are less likely to exercise choices that would banish them from that little box.

All of it sets us at each other’s throats and thus is not helpful to say the least. You could even say that it serves the purposes of people who want to oppress woman, so maybe we should cut it out just out of spite for them. I mean whatever get’s you out of bed in the morning right?

I used to think porn, masturbation etc who wrong and it has taken me a long time to earn my mental freedom and I will goddamned if anyone is going to put me back in the prison. I am not saying that you must enjoy porn or masturbate furiously or make porn in order to be a liberated woman, only that it must be an option for those who want it. I’m not simply satisfied that woman are no longer “treated for the vapours” or lobotomized for having sexuality. I believe we need to remove the sanctimonious puritanism that unknowingly poisons our every action.

In my book “You can suck all the dick you want and still be a feminist, Mary” and enjoy it and be filmed doing and get paid for it etc etc.

Give me orgasm or give me death!

Chanson de Tempête 24/09/2016


World Cup of BS

Here is the reason why the world cup of hockey hosted by the NHL is a complete sham.

Quite simply the US and Canada have stacked the deck as much as they can to make sure a team from this continent wins, which is to say that the NHL has rigged it that way.

Here’s the teams for the tournament per the NHL.

Team Canada, Team Czech Republic, Team USA, Team Finland, Team Russia, Team Sweden, Team Europe and Team North America.

At first glance it doesn’t seem too weird. Unless you’re familiar with International play such as the World Championship you might not even think any strong teams from Europe have been excluded but Team North America has to stick out like a sore thumb. What other countries is that team going to cover? Canada and the US are already represented. My point exactly. More on that in a minute.

First let’s look at the rationale for determining the European teams. Russia, Czech Republic, Finland and Sweden are all obvious choices. The supposed idea behind having a team Europe seems obvious too. One big team for all the countries that the NHL deems too weak to field a team of their own. This team can only be comprised of players from countries not already represented. OK that seems fair except that Team North America no longer makes any goddamn sense.

Well that’s because Team North America is comprised of North American players under 21. So the home continent is double dipping but won’t let any of the big 4 European countries do the same. Yeah that sounds completely fair.

All this is being done in the name of parity because North American arrogance can’t fathom the thought that maybe there is one more team in Europe that could compete in this pool and make Team North America unnecessary. Let’s see if we can find one.

The first team that sprang to my mind was Slovakia. A quick look at the medal winners from the World Championships of Hockey, put on by the IIHF, shows that since 2000 Slovakia has one gold medal, two silver medals and one bronze. For comparison the US has two gold medals since 1921 and none after 1960. They have just 18 medals total. Slovakia may only have 4 since the split in 1993 but before that, and yes they should get credit for these as well as the Czech Republic, Czechoslovakia won 34 medals.

If those medals were included in their total the way they are for the Czech Republic then they would be right behind Sweden and way ahead of the US in total medals, which would also put them ahead of Finland. The only other teams that high up the medal chart are all represented.Add to that the fact that the International Ice Hockey Federation has them ranked as 7th in the world, behind the six legitamate teams competing in the so called World Cup this fall.

Now pardon me but I think leaving them out in favor of an under 21 US/Canada team is a total slap in the face.

This event clearly isn’t about international competition. It’s a thinly veiled promotional event showcasing NHL talent and the NHL is still comprised mostly of players from North America. You can see a handy chart of players by birth country since here. Based solely on representation if anyone should have two teams it should be Canada but I wouldn’t support that either.

Having taken up the torch for Slovakia then here is how my loyalties will be prioritized for this event.

Team Europe

Czech Republic (nothing new here)

Finland because I’d really like to break out my Rask haiku/dance from the Olympics again and I really like their chances.

Anyone who can beat the US, Canada or Team Bullshit. Yes that includes Russia and Lundqvist-ville! (Lundqvist-ville, also known as Sweden )

That’s how serious I am about this but if there’s no one left to beat team USA besides Canada then I’ll root for my home country. I guess. If it comes down to that. Jeesh!

Not So Fun Fact:

Did you know that when the Czech Republic and Slovakia became separate teams only Slovakia was relegated to a lower international tier of competition? They had to earn their way back up to where they had been as one country. Kinda sucks huh? But the managed it in three years.

PS if you think having multiple allegiances is strange, you can read more about it here. Basically I care more about having a really exciting competition than national pride and when it comes to hockey, I think even Canada can use the occasional humility check now and then. You can deport me as a Russian spy if you want but I would do a happy dance if Ovechkin came out on top of this thing. Cause let’s face it. There is nothing the NHL would hate more than that.

PPS I researched this with google and I’m 100% sure any intern in the NHL office could have done the same if they actually cared about parity.

List of medal winners from the history of the World Championships – here

Details on the Slovakian men’s hockey team can be found here.




feminism, LGBTQ, Uncategorized

What CAN we do?

Never has it been more important for those of us that are or present as straight to leverage our privilege to make this world a safe place for out LGBTQ brothers and sisters.

We need to be the safety that we want to see in the world.

While it may seem that there is nothing we can do that will make an impact and it’s easy to be overwhelmed by the vastness of bullying and discrimination out there, one thing is certainly within our power.

Do not let hate or hate speak flourish in your presence, whether it is your physical presence or even just your facebook page.

Stand up and be counted. It can be as easy as blocking someone who is victim blaming and telling them why.

Call people on their bullshit. Speak up even if it’s just shutting down someone being a jerk on social media.

People are more likely to listen to the opinion of someone who seems like them, ie straight.

Even if you don’t know a single person in the community I bet you have interacted with someone at some point.

Think of the woman standing behind you in the grocery line, the man driving next to you. Would you want to see them gunned down for any reason?

I hope the answer is no.

It doesn’t matter if you know someone personally affected.

This is not happening in a vacuum. It’s not happening on another planet or even in another country, to borrow an expression from Greg Proops who is a genius at drawing attention to social issues.

This is happening right here right now inside our borders and attitudes like that of the person who committed this atrocity are allowed to flourish when good people do nothing and say nothing.

Be an ally. Make it known that you are a safe person to interact with. Be brave enough to wear a button that says you are an ally.

Speak up. Stand up. Just say “no, not around me. I will not let you get away with being an ignorant, hateful, ass in my presence.”

There is always something we can do to help and if you look for a way to do so, you will find it.

visit Glaad for information on being an ally.


Dream Logic


This is what happens when I wake up in the morning, drop the ferret off for surgery and go back to sleep. gotta love dreams that are so mundane they could be real life but are also completely bizarre and frustrating at the same time.

“sorry I was late back from lunch everything got lost and I was fighting with someone over text, I think. Hey where is my monitor?” ( I really should have asked why the teller line was suddenly on the outside deck of an ice ream parlor from Whitehorse circa 1991.)

“Someone smashed it against the outside wall.”


“seriously?! I was gone for 30 minutes and someone committed an act of violent vandalism. WTF? And where are the cops and why does no one seem to care?” ( I should maybe have also asked my co-worker why she was wearing my c-pap mask or at least remarked on us being twins.)

Whatever. I guess I need to spend a bunch of time searching this creepy building for a new monitor.”


comes back empty-handed after an eternity of searching dusty interconnected rooms with radios that literally turn themselves on when you get within two feet of them.


well that’s a no go. All I found was this dog that won’t leave me alone. I’m sure he’s nice but he keeps using his claws on my arm. Can you take him? Thanks.”

Oh and am I the only one who’s noticed that the floor boards in the front entry way are falling in? Seriously there are holes that could swallow entire children and I thought I’d better mention it because there seem to be swarms of children everywhere for some unknown reason.”
Literally no one cares.

you know what? I don’t care either. I need to find my purse and this other purse that somehow ended up here and this other random thing that I just can’t live without that is buried in this maze of dusty rooms full of antique furniture. What the hell is with these radios? Is that news from the 1930’s because that other one was definitely playing music from the 1940’s.”


“I am going to have to ask someone about this. Holy shit!!! where did this vacuum cleaner come from and why is it attacking me? How come it is upright and also has a long hose connected to a bag thingy?”

“Wait-Why does this feel like one of those dreams where you get lost trying to retrace your steps and constantly get lost? Finally a room that looks familiar and has a clear exit to the outside. Oh and there’s Dad maybe he can explain that radio phenomenon.”

A long conversation with my father and a woman from Ireland who I’ve never seen before but is clearly an old friend of the family. While we can talk in-depth about changes in technology and radio programming and TV cable packages neither of them seem to know or care about radios being motion activated in this possibly haunted hell hole. In fact they seem to think I’m weird for even posing the question. Maybe this shit doesn’t happen to everyone.

That’s it I’m just going home but oh shit I can’t leave without putting my cash drawer away. Ummm if the entire counter is gone does that mean someone already put my drawer away? They would have had to be in dual control and that must have been a pain. Should I find someone and apologize? Seriously the whole thing is gone? Time to GTFO. Just as soon as I go back to that place where I stashed all my stuff and grab it because why they hell would I put it down in the first place?!”


Frustrating search through piles of lost and found crap and more getting lost and losing things I just had a second ago.Forget the radios. Why are random kids from my high school playing the weirdest game of hide and seek ever? Who makes ghost noises during hide and seek? Is that Draco Malfoy?”

and we’re back. 


No filming please

So I just saw yet another video of someone waking up from anesthesia and saying weird things, a kid no less. Did you know that consent comes into play in this situation? The oral surgeon’s office has signs everywhere telling people not to take video in recovery because the person does not have the capacity to give consent. It’s a legal and ethical issue. Think for a second about what we’re actually doing. We are often prompting someone in an altered and vulnerable state to say things that are strange in order to share that moment with the entire Internet. That isn’t funny at all. At best it’s exploitative.
Thank you for letting me ruin your fun. Now cut it out.


It’s playoffs

so I gotta root for someone.

Note: this has been edited, rather sloppily to reflect series that have wrapped up since I started writing this.

This is the time of year when the hockey allegiance flow chart comes out. My team, the Colorado Avalanche did not make the playoffs this year, again, oh well. In case of such an emergency I turn to my local team, the Boston Bruins. Whoops. That’s a no go this year too. No worries there’s always the Jagr factor as long as he keeps coming back for more. The Panthers are playing great hockey and are very fun to watch but that’s only one series. There’s a lot more hockey and I need to find a way to care about it before it’s all over for the very brief off season.

Who else really needs a cup? Ovi of course! The Capitals have a lot of talent or rather a lot of unsung heros. Backstrom is a bang up play maker and Braden Holtby is a beast between the posts, so I’ll gladly throw some love Washington’s way.

Look’s like Ben Bishop and the Lightning have already wrapped up those pesky octopus throwing Detroit Red Wings. Well done there. It’s always fun to watch an old rival go down in flames so thank you very much, Tampa Bay. Any team with fans disgusting enough to sneak decaying sea creatures into a public event needs to clean up their “brand”. Happy 25 consecutive years of making the play offs, Detroit. You’re outta here! No. Do not feel sorry for them. They have a lot of talent and I’m sure they’ll be back for the first round next year and every year until the sun burns out. Ooh and she get’s him with the back hand.

I cannot force myself to choose who I like less the Rangers or the Penguins. Crosby is the golden child that I am sick of hearing about. He’s like the Tom Brady of the NHL and I’m so over all the conversation of what his place is in history and general felating of his ego. He already has a couple rings so whatever. On the flip side Lundgvist is the new Mike Richter and I loathe his smarmy neatly trimmed bearded face. He’s so fast he snatches particles of light out of the air. He’s got the longevity of Broduer, blah blah.So I’m just waiting to see who get’s wrecked in the next round. Well looks like it’s going to be the Penguins.

Now moving to the Western Conference all my picks are based on hatred because they’re all rivals. Let’s start at the bottom of the hate chart and move up. The Ducks don’t have Selanne anymore so fuck em. Go Nashville, you bucktoothed horribly named mother fuckers. Seriously were all the good cat names taken? You might as well have called yourselves the Pedos. But despite all that they have some really talented young guys who’ve performed well on my fantasy team, Roman Josi, Filip Forsberg etc and I’m sick to death of Bruce Boudrea’s gloating about the Ducks always winning their division. They haven’t made it past the second round in all those years of of taking down the division so I guess their elimination will just be “business as usual” eh Bruce?

LA and San Jose can beat up on each other as much as they want as far as I’m concerned. Half of San Jose has been rocking play off beards since last year and they look like crazed mountain men on ice but LA wins too much so whatever. Whoever comes out alive will just get plowed over in the next round anyway. May the least boring team win. Well damn San Jose. I guess you’re it.

Dallas is on the brink of eliminating the Minnesota Wild and I am stoked as hell. The Wild are the Av’s biggest rival now that the conferences have been redrawn to leave Detroit in the east and the hostility between the two fan bases is as bitter as that of Montreal and Boston. Minnesota nice, my ass! Some particularly unprincipaled of their lot proved last spring that they didn’t have limits to their scumbaggery by dragging children from an Av’s charity event into the bickering. Twitter can be an ugly place my friends. Elimination at the hands of the Dallas Stars who used to be the Minesota North Stars would be especially sweet, for me and not really anyone else. Suck it Minnie!

Now here is the biggest kicker of them all. Chicago versus St. Louis. Talk about the enemy of my enemy. I’ve hated the Blues since the 90’s for some dumb reason. I think it has something to do with them kicking Toronto’s ass once and most certainly my irrational dislike for Brett Hull. I was more happy about Jagr bumping him down the all time goals list than anything else that happened this season. I’ll always remember where I was the night that all important goal was scored, at a metal show checking my phone like an asshole! Now as much as I hate the Blues, for serious reals. I mean I would actively root for Montreal against them, I hate rapists more. No don’t talk deneyers. Just shut yo’ mouth. This is my platform. Needless to say I’m pulling for St. Louis all the way. Also Chicago wins too much if you need a less personal reason and dynasties are boring so fuck em.

All the while I’m watching the teams shape up for the World Championships in Moscow and St. Petersburg. Avalanche boys Mat DUUUUchene and Calvin ‘Picks!’ Pickard have been named to team Canada but honestly I got bored with our domination internationally so I defected a long time ago. I’m not being bitchy. I spreading the looove. This year I’d like to see Slovakia win because fuck Yeah Chara. Need I say more? Granted I’m not 100% sure he’s playing but it’s likely. Then running down from there my perrenial pick, Czech Republic, then Finland. Rinne is busy in the playoffs so it would be nice if Tuukka Tuuka would come out and play although Finland does have a nice amount of depth in goal. Then I guess I pick Canada and finally ANY team that can beat the US. Yes that includes Russia cause, come on, they missed the podium at their own olympics and it would suck to do the same at Worlds. Although a total upset from Latvia or Belarus would be amazing. Internationally I can find a way to be happy for pretty much anyone, except the US. Seriously you can’t sit with us.

PS Pickard’s nickname must be squealed with both fists raised. “PICKS!”